Thursday, July 07, 2005
♥ Urgent Meeting?
Last night, I watched the daily episodes of Akademi Fantasia. And they were showing the part where the students were discussing about Amylea. The students had an urgent meeting with Puan Siti Hajar to settle the problem.
Can you imagine being the cause for a meeting? I mean not a good cause like celebrating a victory or success of a project or a promotion, but because some of them do not like a certain trait in a person. In the first place, why do they have to raise this issue as a big problem? Settle it like adults please.
Well, maybe they are not adults yet. But the thing is that last night's episode made me remember the same incident that happened to me in form 1. I really hate that school and my seniors until today . If I meet them anywhere, I would just ignore them and maybe people might say that I would pull my stark up face . Well, that incident made me change and made me think.
I was enrolled in a semi-boarding school and I was staying in the hostel. Once being an active schoolgirl changed me when I was accepted to join a sekolah agama. The first few months, I was told not to do this, not to do that but my seniors were allowed to do whatever they want but we, the juniors were not allowed to do it because it was 'haram'. Well, not that word, but it meant something like that. I felt like it was a cultural shock to an active schoolgirl who likes to play sports and join the debate competition.
The girls' hostel will have a meeting almost every weekend just to inform all the students regarding new regulations or any activity happening the next week. The 'other' purpose is also to brainwash the juniors and tegur apa-apa yang they do not like us doing (ie. flirting with the seniors - guys).
I was a bit curious why in all the meetings I attended for the first 6 months, my name has not appeared in any of the meetings. I know that I am not perfect and I do have things that may not seem appropriate for juniors doing them. But I was never mentioned in the meetings for my so-called wrongdoings according to them.
But things changed. It was a Friday night, and there was this 'special' meeting called for. I was acting normal to expect new information regarding the activities. But I was wrong. The first thing that the head of the girls' hostel was the purpose of the 'special' meeting called was to tegur me.
I was surprised as I was curious to know why. And then it all started. My seniors accused me of being too friendly with the canteen staff (he was a guy and I have never talked to him except say thank you after serving lunch in our trays and that was done with NO EYE CONTACT!) How can they accuse me of flirting with him? And the best part was that they made up stories saying that I gave my name and my phone number to him! When I said I have never done that at all, and I even swore in God's name, they said that they have the number. I was furious so I asked for the number if they really have proof. And they said that the number was with another senior in another hostel. I was like so furious and I just sat there staring at them waiting to eat them alive!
The second reason was because a popular senior (guy) 'rejected' a senior and was said that that guy liked me. Ha..ha.. very funny. And that senior took it seriously and made up stories that I was again flirting with him. Puhleez.. I had a lot of other things to think about than flirting! Why were they so jealous of me? Why? I never found out why but I guess I grew up thinking that I may be a bit prettier than them. Ha..ha.. padan muka!
And the last reason was that I was always alone and had no close friends. I did have close friends but they did not accept my answers. They just said that I was always alone and I thought that I was too good for them. My goodness.. how can they think of me like that? I admit that I like using my quiet time in being alone because I have time to think about my past, present and future. And I will study what went wrong or what should I do and so on. Like muhasabah diri. But I didn't know that by being alone, it triggered their hatred towards me.
In the end, because I was so furious, I just sat there after being tired to defend myself beacuse I knew that in the end, they will never stop giving excuses when I want proof.
That particular day, I became more matured and I knew I had grown up. And I have always believed that by being open, people will accept anything that people may say about you.
Can you imagine being the cause for a meeting? I mean not a good cause like celebrating a victory or success of a project or a promotion, but because some of them do not like a certain trait in a person. In the first place, why do they have to raise this issue as a big problem? Settle it like adults please.
Well, maybe they are not adults yet. But the thing is that last night's episode made me remember the same incident that happened to me in form 1. I really hate that school and my seniors until today . If I meet them anywhere, I would just ignore them and maybe people might say that I would pull my stark up face . Well, that incident made me change and made me think.
I was enrolled in a semi-boarding school and I was staying in the hostel. Once being an active schoolgirl changed me when I was accepted to join a sekolah agama. The first few months, I was told not to do this, not to do that but my seniors were allowed to do whatever they want but we, the juniors were not allowed to do it because it was 'haram'. Well, not that word, but it meant something like that. I felt like it was a cultural shock to an active schoolgirl who likes to play sports and join the debate competition.
The girls' hostel will have a meeting almost every weekend just to inform all the students regarding new regulations or any activity happening the next week. The 'other' purpose is also to brainwash the juniors and tegur apa-apa yang they do not like us doing (ie. flirting with the seniors - guys).
I was a bit curious why in all the meetings I attended for the first 6 months, my name has not appeared in any of the meetings. I know that I am not perfect and I do have things that may not seem appropriate for juniors doing them. But I was never mentioned in the meetings for my so-called wrongdoings according to them.
But things changed. It was a Friday night, and there was this 'special' meeting called for. I was acting normal to expect new information regarding the activities. But I was wrong. The first thing that the head of the girls' hostel was the purpose of the 'special' meeting called was to tegur me.
I was surprised as I was curious to know why. And then it all started. My seniors accused me of being too friendly with the canteen staff (he was a guy and I have never talked to him except say thank you after serving lunch in our trays and that was done with NO EYE CONTACT!) How can they accuse me of flirting with him? And the best part was that they made up stories saying that I gave my name and my phone number to him! When I said I have never done that at all, and I even swore in God's name, they said that they have the number. I was furious so I asked for the number if they really have proof. And they said that the number was with another senior in another hostel. I was like so furious and I just sat there staring at them waiting to eat them alive!
The second reason was because a popular senior (guy) 'rejected' a senior and was said that that guy liked me. Ha..ha.. very funny. And that senior took it seriously and made up stories that I was again flirting with him. Puhleez.. I had a lot of other things to think about than flirting! Why were they so jealous of me? Why? I never found out why but I guess I grew up thinking that I may be a bit prettier than them. Ha..ha.. padan muka!
And the last reason was that I was always alone and had no close friends. I did have close friends but they did not accept my answers. They just said that I was always alone and I thought that I was too good for them. My goodness.. how can they think of me like that? I admit that I like using my quiet time in being alone because I have time to think about my past, present and future. And I will study what went wrong or what should I do and so on. Like muhasabah diri. But I didn't know that by being alone, it triggered their hatred towards me.
In the end, because I was so furious, I just sat there after being tired to defend myself beacuse I knew that in the end, they will never stop giving excuses when I want proof.
That particular day, I became more matured and I knew I had grown up. And I have always believed that by being open, people will accept anything that people may say about you.
Am i really never good enough for you?
2:20 PM
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2:20 PM
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